Projecting Security: A Skill For Interaction

Day by day we interact, either by being in contact with others physically, virtually and even with us. Therefore, it is important to develop skills that enhance assertive interaction. Thus, we add steps for our well-being. Projecting security is one way to do it.

We invite you to explore this skill with us at Mind is Wonderful.  We will tell you what it consists of, how to do it step by step and what are the benefits. In this way, you will be able to identify different elements that are facilitating or not facilitating this ability. In addition, from this analysis you can draw up a plan to improve them.

What does “project security” mean?

Seeing what each word is about will help us understand the meaning of this skill. Projecting according to the Royal Academy of the Spanish Language means ‘throwing, directing forward or at a distance’. And, security ‘feeling of total confidence that you have in something or someone’. Then, projecting security would be orienting ourselves towards trust.

Projecting security implies transmitting that trust. For this reason, when it comes to projecting security, others also count. In addition, this skill goes hand in hand with others such as: empathy, motivation, self-esteem, etc.

We are talking about a skill that is not forged overnight, although with intelligent intervention we can achieve good results in a short time. Most of the time we meet people who project security and we believe that they were born with a wonderful gift. But it is not simply a gift, it is a skill that is being forged, even if it is unconsciously.

How to project security?

We show you step by step how to do it. Join us!

1. Know ourselves

It is the first step: if we do not know who we are, what we want and where we want to go, we will hardly be assertive when it comes to projecting security. So, we need to make a journey to the depths of our being and get to know each part.

Therefore, we must be open to meeting both our lights and our shadows. Each aspect is essential because it is part of us: knowing how we are, it will be easier to design strategies to guide ourselves towards trust and transmit it to others. In this way, we speak of a facilitating element.

Now, don’t think that a trip will suffice. Our inner world, like the outer world, also changes. We are dynamic and open to transformation through different types of experiences.

2. What is our motivation?

Once we get to know each other, we can ask ourselves the question: what motivates me? It is an important question, as it will help us find an address. Thus, we will obtain clues about what we must do to achieve our goal.

In addition, motivation is closely related to our state of mind. It is sensitive to joy and sadness, anger or surprise. Giving space to each emotion will make it easier for us to find that motivation that is going to be our engine to be able to project security.

3. Who are we addressing?

We must take into account who we are addressing. Is a person?; Are there many? Is it close? Is it a stranger? it’s me? Answering these questions will make it easier for you to know who it is and once you know it you can start to think about the most assertive way to address yourself.

When we talk about assertiveness, we refer to a communication style that makes it easier for us to know our own rights and respect those of others, transmitting the message in the best possible way. So, to project security, it is necessary to be assertive, and for this we must understand well who we are addressing.

For example, we do not address a 5-year-old child in the same way as a 17-year-old adolescent or a 40-year-old adult. Even if all the people were the same age, each will differ in other variables: the characteristics that give shape to the profile of each one they charge a lot of value.

4. Enhancing empathy

In the first section we mentioned that we can project security by intervening on different variables. One of them is empathy. Understanding, both emotionally and cognitively, the mental state of the other in their circumstances, getting this kind of diagnosis right, will make us project greater security in our reactions.

5. Listen 

It seems simple, but it is not. It is something other than hearing, which does not necessarily imply voluntary action. On the other hand, to listen, the willingness to pay attention to what the other tells us, or what we say to ourselves, is necessary.

It is a step towards the projection of security, because by attending to the other we connect more easily. And, when the other feels listened to, he will be able to see in us a safe person. In addition, by doing it with ourselves, we encourage reflection and facilitate the ability to be authentic.

6. Resilience

We all come to have great difficulties, in which we feel overwhelmed and do not know what to do. It is important that we accept that things can go wrong, and that we let the emotions that arrive flow. But it is also essential to get up after falls.

Resilience is that ability to overcome problems. It is important to project security, because when we fall many times we stop believing in ourselves and by doing so we begin to project that lack of confidence. Therefore, what we transmit on those occasions is a lack of security.

7. Accept that not everything is under control

In some moments things get out of our hands, it is better to accept it; swimming against the current, we will get more frustration. On the other hand, if we accept it, we will be in a position to move better in our midst.

9. Trust us

Self-confidence is a great step towards projecting security and cementing our self-esteem. This is how Isabel M. Hauessler and Neva Milicic teach us in their book “ Trust in oneself. Self-esteem development program ”, in which they emphasize the formation of self-esteem and self-concept and show a series of educational strategies.

Benefits of projecting security

When we project security we have great advantages. We show you some:

• Self-esteem increases.
• We acknowledge our mistakes.
• Improve our resilience capacity.
• There is greater self-confidence.
• Relations with ourselves, with others and with nature improve.
• We are more creative.
• Increase self-knowledge.
• We are more assertive in our relationships.
• Authenticity is facilitated.
• Spontaneity is enhanced.
• We free ourselves from tensions.

Projecting security implies taking a trip to our interior, as well as an openness to change. Security will make us gain spontaneity, making complicity moments more frequent