Paralysis Of Perfection: When Fear Of Failure Paralyzes Us

The paralysis of perfection defines that state in which one yearns to reach 200% of his potential and what he achieves is to stay at 0%. Salvador Dalí said with great success that if there is something that we must discard from our mind, it is the idea of ​​achieving something perfect because this status is never achieved. However, the brain cannot help feeding that focus, that unhealthy need.

The history of cinema tells that there was no more perfectionist and detail-obsessed director like David Lean. Thanks to him we have wonderful productions such as Lawrence of Arabia, The Bridge on the River Kwai or Doctor Zhivago . His fixation on taking care of each shot was exasperating, to the point of exhausting a good part of the film crew with its demands and peculiarities.

Well-known is the case of his wish that a snowy field with poppies appeared in a scene by Dr. Zhivago. The conjunction was by itself impossible to achieve, which caused a notable delay in the filming, in addition to economic losses. His biographers explain that this desire, to achieve perfection in each film, brought him periods of depression and despair, as well as many discontent with his fellow professionals.

The American writer Pearl S. Buck said that the desire for perfection makes some people totally unbearable. To this we must add something even more important: emotional suffering and psychological exhaustion. We analyze it.

Paralysis of perfection, what does it consist of?

Science tells us that young people are more perfectionists than ever. Furthermore, research studies such as those carried out at the University of Western Ontario (Canada), for example, show us that perfectionism has risen substantially since 1990. The millennials fight against this dimension now much more than previous generations.

All this has a high cost that often results in anxiety disorders, stress, depression and even eating disorders. Thus, the most common phenomenon in these situations is undoubtedly the paralysis of perfection. Let’s understand what it is.

Paralysis of perfection and fear of failure

The paralysis of perfection defines the immobilizing fear of failure and not meeting our expectations as well as those that others have of us. Thus, when they ask us for a project, a job or the contribution of an innovative idea, it is very common to say to ourselves that of “I am going to give my best, I am going to offer you something extraordinary”.

However, what happens after this adopted goal is that stress paralyzes us. And when stress and anxiety hijack the mind, creativity doesn’t surface. Because our psychological universe does not work low in states of high emotionality. The fear of failure blocks us and innovation and creative ideas do not germinate in this context.

What causes this need to achieve perfection?

We know that behind the paralysis of perfection is the fear of failure and also of disappointment. Now, why do we feed that fear? Why, instead of allowing ourselves to enjoy the performance process, are we gripped by anguish?

There are several hypotheses that explain it. They are as follows:

• Much of this quest for perfection is mediated by upbringing and education. There are many parents who encourage in their children the need to be the best, to achieve excellence in everything they do. This eventually leads them to develop unhealthy self-demands.
• On the other hand, it is necessary to talk about factors such as lack of self-confidence or even task overload. Sometimes we have a considerable backlog of jobs and high pressure about it. If you also add the need to do certain things perfectly, anxiety freezes us.

• Likewise, there is also another recurring factor in the field of organizations. There are times when a leader, for example, is challenged to make a decision on a specific problem. Analyze a thousand pieces of information and evaluate dozens of strategies. However, the simple fact of having to evaluate multiple data at the same time causes the phenomenon known as analysis lockdown.

How to handle blockage by aiming for perfection?

Blocked, stressed, scared, nervous, and even exhausted. Paralysis due to perfection subjects us to a disabling, unproductive and distressing psychological state. It doesn’t matter how exceptional the person is. Your skills and knowledge matter nothing if you lead to that mental fog orchestrated by fear and anxiety.

What can we do in these circumstances? We analyze it.

3 strategies to reduce paralysis by perfection

The first strategy is simple: relax and expand the focus of attention. A mistake that people who are obsessed with perfection make is to look at the details, to attend to very specific aspects to the point of losing perspective.

Sometimes when you put distance you see more things. Sometimes when the mind rests, the best ideas come . Disconnecting to connect with greater intensity later is the best key.

Another basic and essential resource is to improve self-confidence. Self-demand makes us not enjoy our performance. It is true that ambition can work in our favor. However, we must ensure that the result of this attempt to improve does not end up paying our self-esteem. Treating each other with kindness and trusting in our own abilities is decisive.

Finally, it is necessary in turn that we reduce ruminant thinking. Obsessive and negative ideas, the mind that does not stop turning things without direction or meaning, are the engine of paralysis by perfection. Let’s avoid leading to this exhausting rumination cycle. Let’s try, as much as possible, to reduce the greatest enemy to performance and well-being: the need to be perfect.